Men are from Mars and women are from Venus and apparently the space-time continuum provides wildly different rules for these differing planets of the sexes and their inhabitants, despite what scientists might think about the matter. From where I sit, the laws of time and space are poles apart when it comes to men and women because given the same amount of time they do NOT arrive at the same place in space.
That Einstein guy? He had a lot to say about time and space and objects moving through them. I’m sure you’ve heard that one of his brilliant thoughts was about space and time being relative, pointing out that an object in motion actually experiences time at a slower rate than one at rest. Years before that, H.G. Wells wrote, “There is no difference between Time and any of the three dimensions of Space, except that our consciousness moves along it.” Holy bosons, but those words to goosebump by. Honestly, when fiction and science meet it can be a beautiful thing. [A perfect example is Dr. Michio Kaku. That the guy is the wailing rock guitar that String Theory is built on.]
Now, my own time-space theory has little to do with science and everything to do with observation and emotion (I’m a girl. Sometimes we do that). I’m going to present a blanket generalization, so bear with me.
Al’s theory was that an object in motion experiences time at a slower rate than one at rest, right? Well it’s been said that, “Mothers have the toughest job in the world” (if they’re doing it right) and I have to believe that makes mothers the quintessential objects-in-motion. We’ll call them Object A. For the sake of this experiment, we’re going to say that the level of motion of a man (our Object B) is… less, so Less = Rest, for now. With me so far? Object A, she’s in motion and Object B, he’s sort of at rest.
As I approach 50, having been in motion for quite some time now, there are a lot of metaphysical miles on my vehicle. I’ve done a lot, seen a lot, laughed a lot and cried a lot. In my life travels, I had two children (which are also objects in motion), been caregiver, held down jobs and served as chief, cook & bottle washer all of which had me in constant motion (and emotion, which will race one’s engine). Multi-tasking women aren’t just moving, baby. They are in hyper-drive. It’s one reason we girls will stop to ask directions: no time to waste during the race of life.
Object B? Let’s say he’s a lovely man who has also done a lot, seen a lot, laughed a lot and cried a lot. Along the way, he may or may not have had children but kept busy instead with work and the business of living, keeping his levels of motion (and emotion) more low-key. To be fair, Mister Object B has been busy, but he’s just not in as much motion (or emotion) as our Object A, who is a constantly spinning, busy, worried, overwhelmed and genuinely knackered top.
Perhaps A & B have recently found themselves at a crossroads, an intersection of life where questions have been posed about new or next paths to be taken. Object A has been told that there aren’t really any new directions for her to take, as the wear and tear on her vehicle make her an unlikely candidate for anything other than resting on her laurels (oh, now she gets to rest?) and preparing for dotage, the only logical next step. Park it, baby. You’re stayin’ put. Social mores haven’t changed greatly when it comes to older women and their strengths and ability to do great things in the “second half” of their life. As a woman of deep emotion, I mean it when I say, “Ain’t that a cryin’ shame?”
Object B, at the same place in time, is somehow viewed differently. Judicators proclaim he is still of strong mind and able-bodied (more or less). His vehicle is deemed roadworthy by society and he is, therefore, granted full access to all that is available on the life’s map. New career? No problem. His graying temples just give him an air of authority and experience. (Object A is not given the same consideration, which totally frosts my cookies. And my hair). New life and/or wife? Easy breezy, Spring chicken ‘n’ peas-e. Why there’s even room for a new batch of kids to ride along!
Hey, Einstein! You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to know that Object A does not experience time at a slower rate because Object A can clearly see that time has slipped through her fingers at an alarming rate, where Object B still has minutes on the clock.
Lucky for me, scientists and string theorists are still hard at work figuring out the whole space-time madness. With any luck, maybe they’ll even figure out how to fix an old transmission to make travel more quark-y, so that Object A feels she finally arrive at the same place, in the same amount of time as Object B, in the future.
