Tea with T.

Best. Words. Ever.

Not too long ago I came across a list of the 100 Best Words Ever.  Seems you CAN Google anything, because that is exactly what I typed into the search bar.  I happen to love words and wanted to know what others thought were the Best Words Ever.  For me, the list of Best Words Ever changes, based on whatever is going on in my life at the time.

Last year was…interesting, to say the least, what with all of the drama that people brought to my table (including, but not limited to: my ex and his band of merry inner demons; the re-finance people and their magnifying glass of seemingly never-ending monetary minutiae; my folks and their increasing medical dramas that unfortunately comes with aging; and one person who I believe has lost his rubber handled safety grip on reality).  With the rather large vat of lunacy I’d been served, I found I needed a better list of words to express the emotions that come with it.  So, on went the Google Goggles in search of the Best Words Ever, to describe what seems to have been one of the Worst Years Ever.  Here, are 22 of them:

 

A matter of life and death.

A hospital setting is an awful place to have conversations.  Small talk usually isn’t anywhere to be had on the menu.  Topics range from the body’s input and output (yes, even the guests pitched in on this one. Especially the over-70 crowd, oddly obsessed as they are with bodily functions); the disease history of one’s family (those half-siblings you half ignore do count, you know); whether the fact that the majority of medical terms are in Italian could be part of some great conspiracy (these being the after midnight/after Ambien chats) and Advance Health Care Directives.

 

Ouch.

 

Seems like people would rather natter on about the frequency of their BM’s over a cafeteria lunch tray of Salisbury Steak than broach the touchy subject of an Advance Directive.  Some people delay discussing it all together, until it is too late.  Or, nearly so.

 

Patience for patients. Caregiving 101.

Nobody really likes being in a hospital, not the visitors, not the staff (and I’m going by facial expressions alone, here) and especially not the patients.  Even if they’re being attended to with the greatest of care and compassion, patients are a surly lot.  Why wouldn’t they be?  They’re not comfortable, they’re not sleeping well and they’re basically not themselves.  Come to think of it, that probably applies to the hospital staff and visitors, too.  For over a week, I stayed at the hospital with someone I love very much, watching over her at night as she fitfully slept and spent her days in full-on fret mode.  In general, this woman can be a bit prickly, but as a hospital patient -- she was more than simply porcupine-like.  Incarcerated, medicated and violated (they mean well, but honestly, those 5am lab people are still vampires), she became more like one of those fish that, when they feel threatened, release venomous neurotoxins… wiping out whoever else is swimming in the tank.

This woman I speak of, who has played the role of “mother” for me since I was knee-high to a very short grasshopper, is neither my biological nor adopted maternal unit, but I couldn’t love her more than if she were related by love or law.  I’ve always said that I care for her enough to give her one of my kidneys should she need it, but I didn’t really think that she’d be admitted to the hospital for that very same organ.  Uh, hulloh?  Note to self:  Be careful what you joke about.  Because, after a week of sleepless nights and some very tense and constantly-questioning/judgement-passing/you’re-doing-that-all-wrong days, I’m not gonna lie, I found myself seriously reconsidering whether one really could procure vital organs, if it came down to it, from Craigslist and an appointment in a dark downtown alley.  You see, it is one thing to cavalierly offer your body parts to someone you love when they’re healthy and happy and a whole other ball of beans when you find yourself in the role of caregiver to the cranky.  The Krav Maga* of Self-Preservation kicks in and you’re just doing what you can to remain vertical.